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What actually makes your life is the journey. That is where you'll see the goodness of God, His mercy and His grace. Don't despise it, the lessons you had to learn, the experiences you had to endure. Just know that it all works out for your good in the end.
Being goal oriented and focused is not a bad thing. It's good to have a focal point, however not at the cost of you hating everything about the present. No one has all the answers as to why this is your path. All we know is that it is. And as they say, you've got to play with the cards you were dealt. Fair? Probably not. But there is no limit to where God can take you if you allow Him to be your true focal point. Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. (Matt 6:33)
Bless and Love Y'all!
Stay pretty & Precious,
Peace